exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
