Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
