i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
