your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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