Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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