Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
You left your phone here
Wait...
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