So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I got her a Nickelback box set.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
