Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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