I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
