Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
