And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
