So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Randomize