He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize