I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
