She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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