My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
