dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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