5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Just high enough for therapy.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
