operation harelip BJ is a go
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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