I cockslap morals
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
