His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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