Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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