Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
