DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
