...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize