Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I just blew my weed a kiss
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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