Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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