you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
