Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
