I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
