i wish there were pregnant emoticons
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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