i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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