oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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