Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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