If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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