Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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