So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
