# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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