I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
