tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
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