i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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