I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize