I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
