Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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