A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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