Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize