im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Randomize
