Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Randomize
