No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize