I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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