you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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